christinchy*

Do you know the feeling when something hurts you so much you have to throw up? When people say things, that hurt you deep inside and can also affect your live really much? I’m not talking about whoever, but about people, that are close to me. And few days ago, I’ve read a quote from Paolo Coelho:

“If you live to please other people, everybody may like you, but you are going to hate yourself.”

And this is how I feel in this moment. When I finally did something for myself, found the one that I loved deeply inside of my soul for past few years, when I was happy and smiling and then they say to me that I’m a disgrace for my family. Thank you. I feel like everything went to ashes and my world collapsed in front of my eyes. I feel so much anger and pain and disappointment and sadness and tears in my eyes. I feel like I have to throw up. I feel like screaming and yelling all over the place and tearing apart everything i can tear and breaking everything that can be broken.

Thank you for the pain you are causing me, thank you all.

Have you ever felt like you really have to scream? Like there is so much inside of you and you can put everything out just by simple scream? It’s not necessary to scream about what you think, it can be simple aaaaaaaaaaa!!!! but there is at least something. There are so many changes in such a short time. Positive changes in my life, but I feel like waving up and down and I think I’m getting “sea-sick”. I need a walk.

Edith Piaf – Non Je Ne Regrette Rien

Love conquers all. When you find your true love, there is no matter of time, place and other people. There grows an universe of only two people and, at the end, the family of their own. You can feel, who is the one. Maybe your brain, thoughts or even people close to you are agains it or are telling you that you’re wrong, but don’t listen! Take a risk! Like Dušan Dim says in his book Distorzija, we are all afraid. But if you don’t take a chance, you can never get the answer from the other side of the hall.

And I made the most important discovery of my career. The most important discovery of my life. It is only in mysterious equations of love but any logical reasons can be found. I’m only here tonight because of you. You are the reason that I am. You are all my reasons. Thank you.” (A Beautiful Mind, John Nash)

Can you say something like this to someone who is next to you every day? Can you feel something like that? So don’t judge, don’t fight and don’t be scared. Live for yourself. Live for the person you truly love. And if there is a little devil on your left shoulder, telling you that you are wrong, ignore it. There are no wrong paths in life.

Dare. Live. Love.

Love conquers all.

Today, I decided to watch a movie called A Beautiful Mind. I assume, most of you have already heard for it. And then I asked myself: where is the line between insanity and wisdom? I know it’s a thin line. Is it insane to dream about becoming recognized all over the world for one of your achievements? Maybe it’s wise not to dream about that, because all great inventions have already been invented. But what about progress then? Is it made only from insane people? People, who live up in the sky (inside their heads) and dream their illusions and then try to live it in their lives? Who knows. Is there even an answer on this question?

Life is too short to wake up in the morning with regrets.

So love the people who treat you right,

forget about the ones who don’t.

And believe that everything happens for a reason.

If you get a chance,

take it.

If it changes your life,

let it.

Nobody said it would be easy,

just that it would be worth it.

Author: M.G.